ONE THIRD? IM GOING TO SPEND ONE THIRD OF MY ENTIRE LIFETIME IN A DREAM STATE THAT I'LL NEVER REMEMBER????
Life is long, it's the longest thing anyone will ever go through (unless there's an afterlife) so how is it possible that we spend roughly 30 years SLEEPING???? that means that those of us who live to be 90 will only have really lived 60 years! That sucks!
Ok, death is a pretty big topic that everyone thinks about.
I envy the people who never really think about it, because I am clearly not one of them. I'm not saying I'm scared of dying, but I'm sure if I really think about it I am. I guess I just don't wanna die. I love who I am and where I am in life, I've been born in such a great time with such great parents and amazing opportunities, I just don't wanna give it up. I'm Jewish, but I always leave room for the unknown. In other words, I'd LOVE if there were a god and I'd LOVE to go to heaven for eternity and just be happy with all my relatives and just to see what it's like. That sounds fucking fantastic, but I don't know if it WILL happen, so I guess most would say I lack faith, and I guess that's true. But when I think about death, the religion aspect (heaven, hell, afterlife) rarely occurs to me.
Have you ever tried to picture death without an afterlife? It is physically impossible because you would have to picture NOTHING. and you may be thinking ''Oh, picturing 'nothing', that's easy'' but you're WRONG when YOU picture nothing, what do you see? black, right? WRONG when you died, you don't see black, you don't SEE you don't THINK you have no distinction between nothing and something, you don't know what's black, what's white. you don't KNOW anything! and that's fucked up! you don't exsits, nothing exsists. you don't even know what you've ever exsisted because you don't anymore!
I sometimes think Of my grave, how long will it take until people forget about it? basically everyone knows where their parents graves are when they die and they might know where their grandparents' graves are and SOME people may ever know where their great-grandparents are buried. But most people only know their parents. That freaks me out, I'm gonna live and die. I'll be remembered for a little while but a lifetime later I will be completely forgotten because the only people who relly remembered me the longest--my family--have forgotten me so I'll just be gone, a pebble amongst rocks (great metaphor that I just made up, not bad eh? haha) I'll be just another stone in a jewish cemetery with ''SCHWARTZ'' written on it and maybe some nice words.
Fuck.
I wish reincarnation is real. That, to me, would be the greatest afterlife. to live again. Well, actually it would bethe second greatest.
THE greatest afterlife for me would be a mix. A mix of heaven and reincarnation. Allow me to explain. In my perfect scenario, I would die and go to ''Heaven'' where I would be given a little taste of what it's like lalalaa, BUT I would be given a choice to stay there for eternity OR be reincarnated. But the best part would be, I wouldn't have a dealine! there wouldn't be a reincarnation waiting list, if I wanted to reincarnate at ANY time, I could just walk up to the gatekeeper or whatever and say, I'm ready bud, send me back down! That would be amazing... But then again there are the sickos and the 'bad people' and we'd have to find a place for them, but I have a solution for them too. If you've been 'bad' during your lifetime (only serious shit, murder, rape blablabla) you get reset. you are automatically reincarnated with, no descision because 'bad' people shouldn't have a choice to spend eternity in a wonderful place, they should be given a second chance at life. and If they fuck up again, they go through the same process.
I just realized I'm roughly describing Hinduism... shit... I guess someone's already thought of this, I just put some twists on it... Whatever, maybe I'll become a Hindu, meditation can't hurt right?
Well, it's 12:17and I have to wake up at 6 for an 8:30 class.
G'night gang and remember, don't die yet because I need people to keep reading my posts!
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